A few nights ago I was experiencing some excruciating pain in my knee where I recently had multiple surgeries, plus a staph infection.
A little voice kept taunting me. ” Just go and take the flexorall that is in your fridge. You know it will knock you out, and you can get a good night sleep.” So after a bit of arguing with this voice, I gave in and took the flexorall, which is a muscle relaxer. In the morning I felt like crap, very groggy , very agitated.
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I have noticed that as I go through this recovery process, rehabbing my right knee, that I often do not stand on both feet equally, and then i wonder why i often do not feel grounded and supported! I notice it happens especially when I am in a lot of pain and I don’t want to even give any attention to my right leg while I am walking. I want to deny its existence hoping that maybe I won’t feel the pain. But I had this thought, my right leg needs my attention, now more than ever, and if it is going to heal, it wants to feel acknowledged and that it is still useful to me. So rather than bad mouthing it, I should bathe it in my unconditional love. After all, it is a part of me, it is not separate! Sometimes it feels so separate.
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